Held Hostage By Hunger

My tummy is trying to tell me something and it's confusing!

My tummy is trying to tell me something and it’s confusing!

Does anyone else ever get paralyzed by an occasional snack choice or is that just me?

Not always, but from time to time I will get so overwhelmed by the idea of having to decide what to eat when I am hungry that it will take me over an hour to decide what to eat. And by the end of that hour I am, of course, staaaaaaarving!!!

This is how that conversation goes:

Stomach: Grrrr…

Me: Ooh…I’m a little hungry. I need a snack! What should I have? Well, what time is it? Hmmm…dinner in 2 hours…an apple?

Mouth: Bleuurgch…can’t…eat…another…apple…

Me: A bag of chips?

Mouth: Oooh! Yeah!

Stomach: Noooo! Just thinking about those stupid tiny bags of chips you keep in your house make me even hungrierrrrrrrrrrrr!

Me: Right, that won’t hold me till dinner. I should just eat an apple and a string cheese.

Stomach: Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!

Mouth: Booooooooriiiiiiiiing!

Me: Ok! Alright! Everyone stop yelling at me!

And then I might as well be rocking myself in a corner, sucking on my hair and humming the Battle Hymn of the Republic. Because in those moments I feel crazy.

Thankfully I know I am not crazy. I’m just challenged with being able to eat in moderation without careful thought. And every now and then that challenge feels bigger than it really is and I end up having a conversation with my mouth and my stomach.


My stomach will cut a bitch.

My stomach will cut a bitch.


So be it.

If the craziest I get is feeling threatened by my stomach, then I’ll take it. Maybe I am a little crazy, but as Fred Armisen dressed as Joy Behar from The View would say, “So what? Who cares?” At least my crazy is mildly entertaining.

So what? Who cares?

So what? Who cares?


And how do I get past those moments of paralysis caused by a fictional argument between my stomach, my mouth & my mind? I don’t know! You want me to be rational now?! The thing about overwhelm is if you stop thinking about it, it usually goes away. At least until you think about it again. For me, that means sipping a cup of tea, eating a boring yogurt and then drinking a whole bunch of water until at least the hunger subsides and I can face that apple again. So I guess the solution to overwhelm is simplicity. When I find myself paralyzed by indecision, that is not the time to pull out my recipe books and whip up something new. That is the time to put a no-brainer food in my mouth whether my mouth likes it or not. Sometimes a stomach just needs to be fed and it’s not always going to be fed the perfect, mouth-satiating snack. It just needs to stop thinking about how hungry it is.

Oh God. Now what am I gonna make for dinner…..?


One thought on “Held Hostage By Hunger

  1. I heard a good “gauge your hunger level” tip which was “Are you hungry enough to eat an apple?” I think the thinking was that usually an apple is a totally “meh” food, and if you’re hungry enough to eat a boring snack to tide you over, you’re hungry enough to snack. (And eat an apple.)

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